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Joke of the Day

"When i was a kid we played football on a bit of grass at the bottom of the bridge where people often committed suicide... We used the jumpers for goalposts."

Next Joke
 
"I love my relationship with my bed. No commitment needed. We just sleep together every night."
"Me: Bless me father for I have sinned... Priest texting me back: I already told you, I'm not absolving u of your sins unless you come in."
"Fred: Betty has lovely long red hair all down her back. Harry: Pity it's not on her head!"
"I hate being ""backwards guy"" when moving funiture. I could get hurt."
"Why are Catholics the worst drivers? They always pull out at the last second (usually to avoid a child)."
"If stupidity was a crime... Sarah Palin would be public enemy #1"
"Yesterday I was just a dude in a hoody whispering Black Sabbath lyrics to a goat. Today, I am the leader of a petting zoo cult."
"At which place do mostly all men and women have curly hair? Namibia... but i like the way you think ( )"
"What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Convincing their family to consent to it!"