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Joke of the Day
"If stupidity was a crime... Sarah Palin would be public enemy #1"
Next Joke
"Thanks a lot bathroom doors with the gender written in weird symbols. I just want to pee, not solve a sudoku puzzle."
"How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1, it's a goddamn electrician, what'd you expect?"
"I wore a suit to Walmart and they made me their king."
"An alarm clock that texts your boss for you the fifth time you press snooze"
"Thank you student loans, for helping me get through college. I am forever in your debt."
"ELI5: what is it like being 6? I'm only 5 and I'm about to turn 6."
"I just spent fifteen minutes wondering how mermaids poop in case anyone out there is looking for a best friend or arch nemesis or something."
"I saw two lesbians kissing in the park. ""There's a time and a place for that,"" I told my wife. She said, ""Yeah..."" I said, ""It's 9pm and my house."""
"I still remember when airlines gave you two choices; smoking, and chain smoking."