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Joke of the Day

"What do Taylor Swift and Avada Kedavra have in common? They'll leave you breathless or with a nasty scar."

"5: ""Dad, to be the man of the house, you need to wear pants."" Me: ... 5: ... Me: ""It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. Job's all yours."""

"Connecting to a wifi named 'Martin Router King' ... ... and suddenly I have a stream."

"*boss walks in Me: I lost my contact Boss: Why are you naked & why is Greg under your desk? Me: Boss: Me: Shut the door when you leave"

"I'll do anything to prove I'm not lazy. I'll go the whole three yards."

"Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?"

"A Chicken and an Egg are sitting in bed. The Egg looks depressed; the Chicken satisfied. Not much of a joke, but it solves which came first."

"Trash can and chileans(Geopolitic humour) what is the difference between a trash can and a Chilean? The word"

"Why couldn't the Buddhist monk send his mother a birthday card via email? He had no attachments."

"A buddy had a lawn mower accident and died after getting the ends of his feet cut off. Doctors diagnosed him as lack-toes intolerant"