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Joke of the Day

"Kraft have just opened up a new factory in Jerusalem... They've called it 'Cheeses of Nazareth'."

"I bought some green apples about a week ago I can't believe they're still not ripe"

"What do you call a cow with no legs? A cow with no legs of course. HA got heeem."

"I'm Thirsty! Hey Thirsty, I'm Friday. Wanna go out on Saturday for a Sunday? ^I'm^sorry"

"What's long and hard and full of seamen? The tube sock under my bed."

"It's my birthday, so here's a related joke. Why are birthdays good for you? - - - - - Statistics show: those who have the most, live the longest."

"Whenever you're mad at someone, just take a deep breath and count to 10. Those 10 seconds will give you time to think of the perfect insult."

"What did the soap say to the hands as they were being washed? ""I think we're in sink."""

"Did you hear about the horse that has made a dozen films? He's not a star though he just does bit parts!"

"*puts arm around you* You've been burned before but, you're safe with me. Let your gaurd down, girl. *steals your pizza*"