17516

Joke of the Day

"What do you get if you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing you can't cross a vector with a scaler."

"What do you get if you cross a Boxer and a Painter? Mohammed Dali"

"Did you hear the one about the dog with no limbs named joint? Every morning his owner would take him out for a drag"

"How do you make a buff guy talk to you for hours? ask about his routine."

"Q: How do you get a dog to stop barking in the back seat of a car? - A: Put him in the front seat."

"My mother's star sign was cancer. Ironic how she died, really. She died due to fatal injuries from a giant crab attack."

"What's the difference between a garbonzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay $300 to have a garbonzo bean on my face!"

"I can control sheep by just listening to them It's true, I heard them with my own ears"

"RABBIT HUSBAND: You look even better after a full day of work. I don't know how you do it, honey. RABBIT WIFE: They test cosmetics on me."

"Everyone's awkward shines a little brighter on an elevator."