175025

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a shop that sells aquatic vessels? A boat-ique. ...I'll get my coat."

"The Worst Joke Ever What kind of jokes do farmers tell? CORNY JOKES!!!"

"Wanna terrify a homeless dude? Dress as a grocery store clerk and pretend to scan all the stuff in his shopping cart"

"The cheetah is the fastest land mammal right after a politician backpedaling about an opinion he didn't want the public to know about"

"Its sad... Its sad that Wile E. Coyote is remembered for his violence instead of his brilliant paintings of tunnels"

"Long ago, my mentor told me to look into self improvement. He used to mumble a bit, though. Now I don't have the discipline to actually build one, but I know everything about constructing shelves."

"What do you call it when Lenin, Trotsky, and Stalin get together for a drink? A communist party"

"An Italian family is sitting quietly at a table in a restaurant"

"3: *throws plate in sink Me: but you barely ate! 3: yeah, I'm full...what are you eating? Me: the same thing you had 3: can I have a bite?"

"Did you hear about the lady who walked backwards into an airplane propeller? Disassedher"