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Joke of the Day

"Yo mama so fat ...I find myself attracted to her in a very sexual way. Is she seeing anyone?"

"Why do straight white girls always hang out in odd numbers? Because they literally can't even Like. Omg."

"I cut myself while shaving... Because who... has time... for both. ~Jim Hamilton"

"I'm watching a guy on tv who makes a living simply by having opinions about hockey wondering which one of us is the bigger pile of shit."

"I don't smoke, I don't drink, and I don't curse... god damn it - I left my cigarettes at the bar!!"

"Don't worry if you've forgotten the first rule of Passive Aggressive Club, it's fine."

"I phoned my work this morning and said, ""Sorry boss, I can't come in today, I have a wee cough."" He said, ""You have a wee cough?"" I said, ""Really? Cheers boss, see you next week!"""

"Q. If a blonde and a brunette were falling off a building who would hit the ground first? A. The brunette because the blonde would stop for directions."

"My mom made some french fries for you guys... but you were dicks about it because they were potato quality."

"FARMER: The storm destroyed half our crops TRUMP: Have you thought about taking the existing crops and just sort of combing them over th"