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Joke of the Day

"Nobody's taking my presidential campaign seriously. I'll bet this has something to do with my lack of serious sexual indiscretions."

"Did you hear the one.... Did you hear the one about the dad who told his son if you masterbate too much you'll go blind. The son looks at his dad and says, ""Dad I'm over here!"""

"Speaking of short term memory,"

"You can learn a lot about a guy when you go through the pockets of his pants that are at his ankles in the bathroom stall next to your's."

"You should all be proud if me, guys. I got a designated driver for tonight. He's my nephew, and he's six, but he's drank way less than me."

"So many Jehovah's Witnesses and yet still not a shred of Jehovah's Evidence."

"What's grosser than gross? When a midget walks past and says your hair smells nice!"

"A man goes into a shop to buy flowers for his wife. he then fucks the cashier and gets a divorce"

"Question: What's the difference between sin and shame? Answer: It is a sin to put it in but it's a shame to pull it out."

"What title do a sandwich and an occupation in the porn industry share? The Fluffernutter."