174922

Joke of the Day

"Me: Shout out to all my homies! Homies: Stop shouting at us."

"I don't really care for the New England Patriots, but Lance Armstrong used a deflated ball for years and no one said anything."

"I want to have kids before my parents are too old to be able to take care of them."

"Martin Luther King Day White's Sale."

"What did the aliens say, when they came to earth in search of soda pop? Take me to your liter!"

"Ripping a blaring fart every now and then lets your masseuse know who's in charge."

"Thank you Facebook, I can now farm without going outside, cook without being in my kitchen, feed fish I don't have & waste an entire day without having a life."

"What do you call someone who murders a toucan, a leprechaun, and a honey bee? A cereal killer!"

"IT Jokes Wikipedia: I know everything! Google: I have everything! Facebook: I know everybody! Internet: Without me you are nothing! Electricity: Keep talking bitches!"

"Just removed my bra, whipped it around my head, and tried to toss it away, but a hook got caught in my hair. Available for bachelor parties."