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Joke of the Day

"Clinton and Trump now enter the part of the election where they each have to spend a week looking after an egg with ""America"" written on it."

"How do nudists greet each other? With a bare hug."

"What goes well with a mans jean jacket? A suicide note."

"Daughter just asked me how to spell bourbon so she's either asking Santa to hook up her old man or writing a letter to child services."

"""Walk it off"" does not apply to everything. Stupidity, for example. You're not walking that shit off unless it's in to oncoming traffic"

"Doctors have just identified a food that can cause grief & suffering years after it's been eaten. It's called a Wedding Cake!!"

"what do you call someone with unreasonable hearing? ear-rational"

"Now that HBO has a partnership with Sesame Street we'll finally learn how to spell the names of all the Game of Thrones characters."

"When people say ""life is short"". What the fuck? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does! What can you do that's longer?"

"My friend's offering to pay for a trip to NY to be her +1 for a wedding. She's probably going to drug me & sell my organs. *agrees to go :)"