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Joke of the Day

"Want to know how I escaped Iraq? Iran."

"what is your least favorite type of sandwich? Whoops, wrong sub."

"If you're waiting on me to 'get ready' I'm probably just spending 20 minutes trying to get my hoodie strings the same length."

"A man asks a woman: ""-Did you know that laughter is second best way to convince a girl to have sex with you ? "" ""-Really, what is the first ?"" ""-A knife."" ""-Hahaha, you're so funny !"" ""-Good choice."""

"One of my personalities goes to the grocery store and buys healthy food... Now, I can't find anything to eat in the fridge."

"Is this a coincidence or did a Brazilian design the FIFA logo Is [this](http://i.imgur.com/3eTWAuQ) or is this not a facepalm??"

"If you can't be with the one you love then be with the one who has the best cable package."

"Well Officer..we didn't have a bottle so that dead guy over there.. ""Him?"" No the other dead guy..suggested ""Spin The .44""..And I WON!"

"I've seen this joke here before, so I changed it and I think it's better. A Jewish boy asks his dad for $50... And his dad gives it to him!!! Ha ha!"

"Do arcades ever clean the joysticks? 'Cause I've sucked on a few and they tasted awful."