17442

Joke of the Day

"[Request an Explanation] Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil. What does this joke mean?"

"Why is the alcoholic law student sad? Because he couldn't pass the bar."

"Me: I'm so over him Vodka: No you're not, you should text him Me: Really? Vodka: Yes! 25 times"

"College doesn't prepare you for holding in farts in the workplace."

"What do you call a small hairy man of folk legend who's selfish during an orgy? A knob-hoggin' hobgoblin!"

"I got arrested at the airport last week. Appearently security doesn't like it when you call shotgun before boarding the plane."

"I cant English good? I prefer to speaking to writing on paper so that my grammar isn't as tearable."

"Why did no one believe the Psychologist ever went to the bathroom? Because the 'P' is silent"

"Whats the difference between a lentil and a chickpea? I've never paid good money to have a lentil on my chest"

"It's complicated having sex with hipsters. They don't like things that are ""in""."