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Joke of the Day

"What did the dyslexic traveller say when he arrived at an unknown station? Whoops, wrong sub."

"I'm watching so many cute animals videos I think I'm developing aww-tism."

"McDonalds will always have a place in my heart."

"What do you call a prostitute with cum on her face? A Taxi, Her jobs done."

"Why do your in-laws become dangerous after a divorce? They become outlaws"

"I spent 20 minutes at the gym trying to untangle my headphones...I'm done..my arms are killing me!"

"I hate people who say 'age is just a number'... Age is clearly a word."

"If you are going to call the cops every time you spot me in your bushes I don't think this relationship is going to work."

"Ladies I'll drive you crazy with my tongue *Never shuts the hell up*"

"What does a pirate with back spasms say? Shiver me lumbars."