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Joke of the Day

"I'm an 'adult', so why do I dance a little and look around nervously when I find a $20 bill in my jeans I didn't know was there..."

"Yeah, sure, I use made-up words sometimes. Does that make you [Lowers shades] Discomfortable?"

"When I get a little tipsy I like to go to a random neighbourhood, knock on the door and say, ""Sarah Connor?""."

"Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It died."

"/r/programming joke On a scale if 0 to 1, does it hurt?"

"I Used To Be Against Sodomy Butt fuck it!"

"I just got invited to a Game of Thrones themed wedding I think those bastards are going try to kill everyone"

"Why doesn't the Sun go to college? Because he has a million of degrees."

"What 20th century composer would make the best bartender? Philip Glass. (fill up glass)"

"Channel 4 are making a documentary about a black man producing cocaine in his bedroom, they're calling it, ""CHOCOLATE & HIS CHARLIE FACTORY."""