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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Jedi take his MIDI controller into the pool. He wanted to increase his MIDI chlorine count?"

"How can you waste food when there are starving children in...ew onions."

"Dirtiest, raunchiest, most racist joke you've got: I'll start - What do you do when you see a half dead native man crawling across your lawn? Stop laughing and reload"

"What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An investigator!"

"What brand of butter do frogs eat? Country Croak."

"The hostess said to sit wherever I want, but the couple at this table are giving each other weird looks and have totally stopped talking."

"Why do women close their eyes during sex? They can't stand seeing a man have a good time."

"My office has started random urine testing of employees to detect traces of hope or optimism."

"I thought I'd surprise my girlfriend and re-wire the toaster. She was shocked."

"Why do cannibals hate Pentecostals? Because they're always throwing up their hands."