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Joke of the Day

"In a meeting. Can I go first? Thanks. Gets up and leaves."

"An architect is inspecting a bridge... When an Asian man behind to cross it. The architect says: ""The bridge seems to have a slope, yeah?"""

"Having sex is like riding a bike. Specifically, like that scene in Pee-wee's Big Adventure where everyone in the world has a bike except you"

"What is the difference between a dead baby and an orange? [NSFW] I don't fuck an orange after i peel its skin off"

"Blacksmith asked, do you have any experience in horseshoeing? ""Yes, I once told a horse to fuck off."""

"Me: guess who i saw today? Batman: who? M: not your parents B: Y do you always do this? M: cause they told me to B: who? M: not your parents"

"Why did Holden Caulfield hate his job at Sprint? He was surrounded by phone-ys!"

"How is it that my kids can never find their own shoes but... Easily find the one ice cream sandwich I hid behind the peas in the freezer."

"Whats the difference between your Mom and the Pringles guy? I can't get my whole fist in the Pringles guy's can."

"How many NYC cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they just beat the room for being black."