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Joke of the Day

"Today is the day when Marty Mcfly was supposed to arrive in the future and we still don't have hoverboards! I bet you that Michael J. Fox is just sitting at home shaking with anger"

"Separation anxiety is common among toddlers, dogs, and would-be divorcees finding out how much divorcing costs."

"""Waking up when you got a baby, you feel like you drank a bottle of whiskey the night before, except the shit's in someone else's pants."""

"You know what they say about hand jobs and homosexuals... They come hand in hand"

"I would give 10 to most jokes here On a pH scale, cause most of them are just Basic."

"Why did Prince William lose his cool? He wasn't properly heir conditioned."

"I'm writing a book on how to be sneaky... ...It's a lurk in progress."

"What has 12 hands, 12 legs, and 12 eyes? 12 pirates."

"Who held the baby octopus to ransom ? Squidnappers !"

"Sorry I yelled ""chug it"" to your baby, as you were breastfeeding."