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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a meeting exclusively attended by pine, juniper and fir trees? A coniference."
Next Joke
"They changed something in the matrix... and now all the eigenvalues are wrong."
"Whoa whoa, calm the fuck down Swiffer commercials, you're a wet paper towel on a stick."
"Auto correct changed naughty with nausea and it was the best decision i ever made in this relationship."
"How to shave a cat's butt I won't tell you, you dirty person !"
"Arteries have a special place in my heart"
"I think the doctors told me my blood type was A... but I'm not positive."
"Maybe if we start telling people the brain is an app they will start using it."
"I got a handjob from a blind girl last night. She said ""You've got the biggest dick I've ever put my hands on."". I said ""Nah, You're just pulling my leg.""."
"Cup of coffee Patient: Doctor help me please, every time I drink a cup of coffee I get this intense stinging in my eye. Doctor: I suggest you remove the spoon before drinking"