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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when a black guy gets a hard on? The Dark Knight Rises"

"Wanna hear a secret? I KILLED MUFASA!"

"What do you call a cheese that's not yours? My cheese!"

"If you're heartbroken, remember: There are plenty of fish in the sea. But I'd advise giving mankind another chance first."

"*me, at high school prom Me: So, you wanna dance? Her: Definitely! M: Can you tell me why?"

"How do you stop a black guy from jumping on a bed? Put velcro on the ceiling."

"What do you do when you see a spaceman? You park, man."

"If you're wondering what all these scratches on my chest are from, it's because my cat hates to get in the hot tub with me."

"Did you hear about the paddle sale at the boat store? It was an oar deal!"

"[interrogation] Bad Cop: *face way too close to Shakira's waistline* tell me what I want to know"