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Joke of the Day

"TIL grizzly bears are not harmed by microwave radiation. In fact, they are one among several species of non-polar bear!"

"Did you hear about the boss that slept with his secretary and then fired her? He really gave her the shaft."

"Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. Also, no outside food, they are so strict about that."

"There was a guy at the basketball court He tried to make a shot in the fog. He mist."

"gonna name my first born Horse_ebooks"

"Remember ladies, Christmas is over if you sit on a strangers lap now and ask for stuff it's because you're a whore."

"""someone bring me soup."" -every hot girl with a cold ever"

"*wife grabs my wrist as I go overboard* Her: You're... slipping... Me: Pretend I'm the covers. *she easily pulls me to safety with one arm*"

"Are your other donkeys jealous because that's one fine ass"

"Homeless girl ..... I met this girl the other day and gave her my phone number. She said she would call when she got home. I'm beginning to think she's homeless???"