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Joke of the Day

"""To prove how much I love you I'm going to eat this entire pizza."" That's not what I - ""Please stop. Let me do this."""

"How my dad taught me how to button my suit coats. He said *""Think of it like a woman; sometimes the top, always the middle, but never the bottom.""*"

"How do you make an archeologist blush? Give them a dirty tampon and ask what period its from."

"my girlfriend hates orgasms when ever I give her one she just spits it out."

"You: Knock knock, Me: Who's there?"

"What happens when a guy with no legs dies? He punches the bucket"

"Hey, reddit, what is the most offensive joke you know? I just thought of this one. It should be pretty entertaining!"

"What does Santa Claus and Jared from Subway have in common? They both leave kid's homes with empty sacks."

"I'll never understand why the guy that invented Braille didn't just put the dots in shape of the actual letters."

"Your mother is so stupid, she thinks Moby Dick is a venereal disease."