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Joke of the Day

"People wonder why I move to a new place every couple years. The truth is, I'm being chased by a snail with a grenade and a vendetta."

"Did you hear about the Chinese Chef who broke out of jail? Apparently he went out for a wok and never came back."

"B:You can never be possessed by any demonic beings. G:Why? Is it because I am very religious? B:No! Its because you are always so salty"

"What do you do if you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologise."

"I once met a detective who would copy drawings of penises in his spare time. I think his name was Dick Tracey"

"To all the Bernie supporters... This isn't the first time a Clinton has left a bad taste in someone's mouth."

"What's worse than a giraffe with a sore throat? An aardvark with the sniffles!"

"Spider-Man is my favorite superhero whose name is made up of 2 things that scare the shit out of me."

"According to old paintings, there's mad titties in heaven."

"What's the difference between eating pussy and driving in fog? When you're eating pussy you can see the asshole in front of you."