172475

Joke of the Day

"A chronic masturbator walks into a bar ""Oh hi Henry"", said the bartender, ""I've already poured your pint; I saw you coming from a mile away."""

"What's the difference between clever and stupid ? you can't wank yourself clever."

"I invented a new golf ball that will automatically go in the hole if it gets to within 4 inches. Do NOT carry them in your back pocket."

"What's the difference between a porcupine and a Ferrari? With a porcupine, the prick is on the outside."

"Homeless Yelp Review: Dumpster behind grocery on Calhoun & Fairfax BARELY had any rotting fruit. Owner chased me off with a bat. 0 stars."

"Why didn't the lesbians go shopping for sports equipment? Because they don't like Dicks."

"A joke for Europe A Greek, an Italian, and a Spaniard go into a bar and have an awesome time, ordering drinks till dawn. So who pays the tab? A German."

"What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer? A father in law."

"What do you call a tavern that only serves baby foxes and adult felines? Kit Cat Bar"

"My doctor just told me I was suffering from paranoia. Well he didn't actually say that, but I could tell it was what the bastard was thinking."