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Joke of the Day

"Why did the porkchop scream for help? I'd tell you the rest, but I don't want to spoil the meat of the joke."

"Misunderstandings happen when one person is clearly stupid."

"""My wife is like Whiskey."" ""Oh yeah, she gets better with age?"" ""No, she gives me a headache."""

"Girlfriend: ""Does this dress make me look fat?"" Me: ""Stop blaming the dresses."

"""Someone called me a butterface today! Is that bad?"" ""Well it's *half* a compliment."""

"What do you call Venus Williams' collection of Pokemon? The 'mons of Venus."

"Mortal: What is a million years like to you? God: Like one second. Mortal: What is a million dollars like to you? God: Like one penny. Mortal: Can I have a penny? God: Just a second."

"Why do jews like jail Because of all the shackles.....im terribly sorry"

"How are ninjas and soft core porn alike? You never see them coming."

"If you say ""Unique New York"" (5 times fast) is it easy or hard?"