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Joke of the Day

"How are ninjas and soft core porn alike? You never see them coming."

"How do you play the Oscar Pistorius drinking game? Every time your girlfriend goes to the bathroom, take two shots"

"What Did the Sadist Do to the Masochist? Nothing."

"Have You Heard The One About The Sheep? It's baaad..."

"Disney is releasing an alternate version of its latest film for the Indian audience where Nemo's father starts looking for a bride for his son. It's called Finding Dowry."

"Yes I wore a $900 fuchsia southern belle dress to your kid's baptism. When I was your bridesmaid, you said I could always wear it again."

"Hey dude, there's 10 empty urinals in here no need to stand right next to... And now he's talking to me! Someone call 911!"

"Did you hear about Mike Tyson's opinion on ears? He had some biting commentary on the matter."

"So I was on tindr today and someone offered me a $125/hr ""girlfriend experience"" So she expects me to pay her 125 an hour to argue with me in the middle of an Applebee's!?"

"if u disregard the teeth, shark attacks are actually kinda cute"