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Joke of the Day

"My kid was saying they wanted an Omnitrix that let him change into pokemon So am like...you want to be a ditto?"

"Statue of Liberty How do you know the Statue of Liberty isn't French? It doesn't have both arms raised. And yes I know the French manufactured the Statue of Liberty and gave it to the United States"

"What do you call a cow that just gave birth? De-calf-inated"

"And we're still calling it auto ""correct"" because...."

"Amish jokes Have you heard about the promiscuous Amish lady? She had two Mennonite I had the Amish flu last week. At first I got a little horse. Then I got a little buggy... but yesterday I got butter"

"What do you call a lamington that weighs a lot? A lamingTON!"

"Why do atheists scream out 'oh my God' during sex? Because it's unbelievable."

"Working on a new type of martial arts that involves taking money from Hispanics.. called TakeJuan'sDough."

"My wife walked in on me last night and shouted, ""What the hell are you doing with that ivory and gold dress?"" I said, ""It's not what it looks like!"""

"How to get out of buying your kids Christmas presents Explain to them that due to Global Warming that the North Pole melted and that Santa and the Reindeer drowned."