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Joke of the Day

"Bear Grylls lies on the floor at Starbucks peeing into his own mouth, ""this is literally the only way to survive in this environment"""

Next Joke
 
"My computer crashed and now all the other computers have slowed down so they can see what's happening."
"Why did Hitler kill himself? Because he saw his gas bill."
"Drunkenly changed my voicemail to ""if you like cheese, press 2. Para Spanish, press cheese. To hear more cheeses, say goooo-DA"""
"What would you call a set of old school rapper emojis? Em-OGs"
"What country has many sugar? sweetzerland"
"Got so drunk last night I woke up on a sidewalk this morning and rolled under a parked car so I could continue sleeping in the shade."
"dude told me he did a line with Emma Watson but I know he was lying - she's British, they call them ""queues"""
"What do you get if you cross a hedgehog with a giraffe ? A long necked toothbrush !"
"Cheers to the freakin weekend *lays in bed for 2 days straight*"