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Joke of the Day

"My wife cheated on me after I told her about my watchmaker buddy... I guess I should get a big clock, too."

"How was copper wire invented? Two jews found the same penny."

"I tried mugging an old aged pensioner yesterday. I said, ""Give me all your money now, bitch, or you're geography."" ""Don't you mean history?"" she replied. I said, ""Don't try to change the subject."""

"[alligator store] Clerk: $1500. Thanks Me: not gonna say bye to him? Clerk: uh Me: say it Clerk: goodbye Me: say ""see you later alligator"""

"2 Mexicans escape from prison. ""Jesus, take the wheel!"""

"Did you hear about the Bourne identity movie? Matt Damon returns in ..........Still Bourne"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! C-2 ! C-2 who ? C-2 it that you don't forget my name next time !"

"What's better than a rose on your piano? Tulips on your organ EDIT: This blew up. (No pun intended)"

"Did you hear about the vampire at the circus? He went straight for the juggler"

"Is it yoga if you wear sweatpants all day and then hunch over the garbage can as you eat a burrito?"