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Joke of the Day

"My wife cheated on me after I told her about my watchmaker buddy... I guess I should get a big clock, too."

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered six offender"

"Nothing better than hearing that a couple who comments on each other's Facebook statuses broke up."

"Who has two thumbs and wears a mask? Disguise!"

"Me: I got my YOLO tattoo covered up GF: Good. I told you it was just a stupid fad Me: I know GF: What'd you get? Me: *reveals Minion tattoo*"

"It's a shame what happened to the Dolphins's parents...... I can't imagine being an Orfin"

"FIREMAN: this blaze is out of control ME: sometimes you gotta fight fire with fire F: what? No M: *already brandishing a flamethrower*"

"What do you get when you cross a pig with an elephant? A very large animal that knows a lot of jokes."

"What do you call joke told by a duck? A wise quack."

"I just found bacteria growing on my chocolate bar. I guess there is life on Mars after all."