171994

Joke of the Day

"""You remind me of this hooker i knew."" ""You knew a hooker?"" hey you don't call her that, she's your mother."

"Why do women wear make up and perfume? Because they're ugly and smell bad."

"What's the difference between fighting on the internet and participating in the paralympics? None, even if you win, you're still retarded."

"Are you alright? No. You're all....left"

"Say what you want about pedophiles... ...at least they don't speed in school zones."

"I try not to judge my barber for his weight but.. He could be a hair trimmer."

"I had a dream That the most beautiful plate of salmon with lemon zest and crusted parmesan was in front and before I could dig in I woke and saw it was my wife's leg spread open."

"Did you hear the one about the three eggs? Too Bad."

"if you watch the titanic backwards hundreds of disgusting sea zombies come together as a community and rebuild an old ship"

"Objection your honor! He's badgering the witness lmao *Courtroom erupts in laughter* Badger: Ok seriously I'm a lawyer and deserve respect"