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Joke of the Day

"Are you alright? No. You're all....left"

"What did the basic girl say after all her writing utensils broke? I literally cant even write now"

"I walked into a public restroom today that had a ""Changing Table"" sign on the door. I found a pair of scissors and a strap-on dildo..."

"Ever since I became asexual I've found I have to repeat myself a lot. ... You're not getting it? Neither am I. ... Let me reiterate."

"Hard tacos are just soft tacos from the street."

"Remember to practise safe phone sex. You don't want to risk getting hearing AIDS."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? A black guy was following her."

"TIL that humanity's new form of communication is acronyms What does FTFY even mean? I swear to god people abuse acronyms so much."

"Going to McDonalds for a salad roll is like going to a brothel for a hug."

"I tend to drop a lot of glassware but that means I'd be pretty fucking handy in one of those ""In case of emergency break glass."" situations."