171643

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a girl who pushed her father off a cliff? Pushpa!!"

"""Oh Shit, Was That Today?"" an autobiography"

"Sorry! i'm not desperate because i'm single. I'm single, because i'm not desperate."

"Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because it looks like you landed face first"

"The creator of predictive text died today His funfair is next monkey"

"After months of practice, I can finally touch my toes. (By telling them that they are beautiful.)"

"whenever god closes a door he opens a window because he's taking a pretty nasty shit in there."

"Shopping for houses, it seems like a lot of the houses in my price range need some TLC... But I don't want no scrubs."

"Why does Mrs. Claus not have any kids? Because Santa only comes once a year and that's down a chimney."

"Hey General Motors, what about an electronic drum set on the steering wheel? You're welcome."