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Joke of the Day

"I refuse to work with compost It's degrading"

"A group of detectives did an investigation into the iPhone 7 They didn't find jack."

"Thanks to Facebook I feel like we probably need a new word for friend.'"

"Did you know that if you squint at a cat and it squints back, it's the cat's way of saying ""What the f are you looking at?!"""

"My wife got angry when I said ""Samsung""... Apparently that was the wrong answer to: ""What oven should I buy to match my cooking style?"""

"I caught up with my old English teacher. ""What's new?"" he asked. I said, ""An adjective."""

"Got kicked out of the Renaissance Fair after seeing an Asian wearing a breastplate. I said there was a chink in the armor."

"Condoleeza Rice went by Condoleeza Couscous in college."

"I'm going to beat you up with my penis. .... It won't even be hard."

"A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns... But I soon realized that toucan play at that game."