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Joke of the Day

"I hate all the ""creepy clown"" news. I'm having a clown solidarity march at dusk near an abandoned insane asylum. Need a calliope player."

"What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl? An Alley-Gator"

"If I had to choose one word that encapsulates me, I'd say skin."

"Can I man and a woman have sex while running? By principle, yes. By practicality, no. Because a woman runs faster with her skirt up than a man with his pants down."

"Quitting smoking was the easiest thing I've ever done... I've done it hundreds of times."

"Why does Peter Pan always fly? Because he Neverlands."

"What is a pirate's favorite letter? (is it ""R""?) NAAAAAY!!! 'Tis the C"

"I like to finish my pelvic exam by asking the doctor 'hey, where'd your watch go?'"

"My friend offered me a nice stable job. I declined because I don't like horses"

"What's the difference between 1998 and 2016? Hillary Clinton is the punch line this time"