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Joke of the Day

"When I say ""It's a long story,"" it doesn't mean it's actually a long story. It means I just don't want to tell you."

"ESPN First Take - Patriots' Players Question Rex Ryan's Defense"

"Chuck Norris can run up a flight of stairs backwards."

"You know if you stab a salad 23 times It becomes a chopped salad"

"One of my biggest fears is that before I die, spiders will evolve the ability to coordinate their legs and run like horses."

"Honey, I'm afraid we can't get married anymore. weed_hitler69 just told me I was gay. *looks at Xbox* Thank you sir. You've changed my life."

"I put the ogle in Google image search."

"Sound is slower than light... That's why some people appear to be smart before they open their mouth"

"I forgot how to throw a boomerang, but then it came back to me."

"Hate when my GF asks me to hold her purse at the grocery store line cause I really don't like being that guy holding two purses."