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Joke of the Day

"All this month when a waitress asks me how I'd like my eggs, I'll tell her to nog that shit."

"I gotta go guys. I just found out my lunch break isn't 6 hours long."

"Is that a Nexus 6 or are you just happy to see me?"

"What do Harry Potter and Kermit the Frog's penis have in common? Hogwarts."

"What is the best contraceptive for old people? Nudity"

"[Amphibian Playground] BULLFROG: look at all u lil toad nerds TOAD: help! a BULLYfrog! TEACHER SNAKE: i'll handle this *eats everyone*"

"I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant... But then i changed my mind."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bass ! Bass who ? Bass the salt and pepper please !"

"So Darwin comes across a sad penguin in an airport.... He goes up to the penguin and asks, ""Why so angry, you cute little fella?"" The penguin looks up to him and says ""flight's delayed."""

"I met a German girl today. Her phone number is pretty weird, it's all nines."