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Joke of the Day
"Christmas is shit ! Whoever invented it should be nailed to a cross."
Next Joke
"When I order pizza online, in the ""Special Instructions for the Driver"" box, I put ""Tell me I'm a pretty princess"". And they do. And I am."
"No one who heard me talking to my dog would assume that English is my first language."
"If they ever start charging for air... I'll buy a bag of chips, at least it will be a package deal."
"My 4 yr old came in my room last night at 3am. I asked him what was wrong and he said ""how many eyebrows do I have?"""
"Sar-Chasm (noun) When you're joking, but everyone thinks you're being serious, you've fallen into the sar-chasm."
"In a dog eat dog world, the chocolate lab is the most delicious, yet poisonous of all breeds."
"People often accuse me of ""stealing other's jokes"" and being ""a plagiarist."" (Their words, not mine)"
"I met an urban dwarf who keeps perfect time. He's a metronome."
"The Air-force Cadets get Red Bull in their ration packs Because apparently it gives them wings"