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Joke of the Day

"Hanukkah Matata to all Jewish Redditors! It means no worries! Except for the worries you have about disappointing your mother."

"Sex is like Kebab. When it's good, it's really good... ...and when I'm drunk I'm willing to pay for it in a roadside turkish buffet."

"This article says 80% of men feel confident being naked in front of a woman. Twitter says the rest prefer being naked in front of a donut."

"I said to this bloke,""I'm going to be performing in the play *Hamlet* at a local theatre."" He said,""Are you being facetious?"" I said,""No- Polonius."""

"Mike's dad has three sons.. Snap Crackle and...? Mike"

"If you take the word ""spatula"" out of the dictionary it's just a list of things that aren't spatulas."

"I like my coffee like an excellent slave Black!"

"4yo has repeated one word for an hour. 6yo is ninja fighting his imaginary friend. My move to a mental asylum will be an easy transition."

"In hell, your mouth is always freshly brushed & minty, and all they have to drink is orange juice."

"Last night I had sex for an hour and 30 seconds. I love when daylight savings time ends!"