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Joke of the Day
"""Poop fast and they'll think u only peed."" -advice I give my kids."
Next Joke
"How many people from the future does it take to change a light bulb? The lightbulb works fine..."
"What do you call it when Professor X does a wheelie? Professor +"
"Why did the butcher die ? Because he chopped off the wrong sausage."
"Would I be in a porno for a million dollars? It depends. What kind of porn? Will my mom see it? Do I have to pay the million all at once?"
"You people don't appreciate me enough. I'm moving my tweets to TBS."
"What did the leper tell the prostitute? You can keep the tip"
"I tried to buy admission to the World-famous Knife Museum... ...but people kept cutting in line."
"You don't realize just how eco-friendly clowns are until you think about how much they carpool."
"What do you call a chicken crossed with a cow? Cock-a-doodle-moo!"