169995

Joke of the Day

"I sleep with a knife under my pillow. You never know when someone is going to break in and give you a cake."

Next Joke
 
"Whats the gay man's favorite Civil War Battle? Manasses."
"Why do teenage girls only hang out in odd-numbered groups? Because they can't even."
"If life was fair, Ryan Gosling would have been born with Ray Romano's voice."
"How did Viking ships communicate? Norse code."
"Why are there so many Indians working with telemarketing? Because they have the biggest cow center."
"Accidentally pressed the soap dispenser instead of the toothpaste. Mouth feels clean but I don't think I'll be able to curse today. Shucks."
"I know I need to lose weight when.. I ask my boyfriend ""do I look fat in these knickers ? "" and he says "" what knickers ?"""
"What's the similarity between smoking a cigarette and eating pussy? The taste changes the closer you get to the butt."
"I want Ebola... cereal"