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Joke of the Day
"What about that new beer... by Peter Cotton Ale? It's made with more hops!"
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"""Maybe connect two monocles together? Pretty good idea. I have to write this down."" - the guy that invented the pen"
"Scientists claim that the Big Bang was the loudest noise that has ever occured in history. They obviously haven't met my kids."
"Premature Ejokeulation What do you get when you cross someone with a sex disorder and someone who ruins punchlines?"
"Did you hear about the French Olympic race walker who pooped his pants mid race? At least he didn't oui in them too."
"""Stay strong!"" I said to my wi-fi signal."
"Ways to get me naked: 1. Be hot 2. Be funny 3. Be alcohol 4. Pretend to be my gynecologist"
"Best response by a nursing home patient ever. I asked my patient, ""how ya feelin today""? He whispers while still half asleep, ""with my fingers."""
"Why did Hitler really commit suicide? He got the gas bill"
"Did you hear about the new LSU Visa card coming out? You get Les Miles and zero points"