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Joke of the Day
"I was a trampoline salesman Off and on."
Next Joke
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
"What do you call a cow that just tripped? Ground Beef"
"We're going to build a great wall to keep the inspirational tweets out. And Facebook is going to pay for it. Make Twitter Great Again."
"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust A guns only weakness is Obama and rust."
"I fucked this girl for an hour and 45 seconds last night. Thanks daylight savings."
"1. Rent storage unit 2. Procure 3 bodies at morgue 3. Place bodies in storage unit 4. Stop making payments 5. Wait. Best Storage Wars Ever"
"Whats better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ!"
"""Of course I can paint your ceiling,"" Michaelangelo scoffed. ""Gonna paint a bunch of dudes with their dicks out on it though."""
"Scientist My findings are pointless when taken out of context. Media Scientist claims ""findings are pointless"""