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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend recently said that she needs some time and distance... Is she trying to calculate velocity?"

"What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? A salad shooter."

"How do you know if someone is a vegan? Because everyone around them will be giving them shit for it."

"Why couldn't the chemist laugh at the queens fart? Because noble gases are nonreactive."

"My mom always told me to be nice to the neighbors So I told my best friend to suck his own dick"

"What do SpongeBob and LeBron James have in common? They both hit the deck and flop like a fish."

"What is the most common comment on Reddit? OPs mother."

"There are 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary, and those who don't."

"A member of ISIS accidentally blew himself up... Well, Ji-had it coming."

"Video Games made me do it. Rock n' Roll made me do it. Witches made me do it. Satan made me do it. - a short history of responsibility"