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Joke of the Day

"How many cops does it take the screw in a lightbulb? The same number it takes to screw public confidence in law enforcement"

"The residents of Mayberry took a course in computer programming. Whenthe instructor said, ""Compile,"" Gomer went to the head of the class."

"There's a gang in my area... There's a gang in my area who recruit new members by threatening them with all kinds of horrible punishments if they don't join. But enough about the church..."

"Here's how pessimism works. It never works."

"I was sitting in a bar... When a guy yells out, ""Linda why didn't you give your mom any grandkids?"" She yelled back, ""Because I swallowed them all!"""

"Buzz: hey Neil where do cows come from? Neil: I dunno where Buzz: the moooon haha .. .. *single gunshot* Neil: uh Houston we have a problem"

"I would make a sparrow joke... But they don't fly very well."

"How did the guy from Kentucky find his sister in the woods? Pretty good!"

"What is a pigs favourite ballet? Swine Lake!"

"How did the baker put his opponent in checkmate? with an en croissant"