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Joke of the Day

"Teacher:""Okay class, time to take a test. Please take out your no.2 pencils."" *Takes out no.1 pencil* ( )"

"What's round and black and blue? A blueberry that occasionally gets hit by her husband"

"I learnt that Mel Gibson was born in Australia Well I guess you could say he was from... -puts on glasses- MELBOURNE"

"What do a washing machine and a one night stand have in common? a washing machine doesn't follow you around for a week after you put a load in it.."

"Having children teaches you patience, humility, love and to never, ever, be surprised when you find a Barbie doll leg clogging the toilet."

"What do you call silly pasta? A noodlehead.."

"Little Johnny is sitting in geography class when the teacher asks him, ""Where is Pakistan?"" He replies ""Outside playing with Paki-Dave."""

"Cyclists who don't obey the rules of the road should have to wear their google search history on a t-shirt."

"What do you call a hamburger that runs for president? A McTrump"

"If you walk in to a room and find a man having a stroke... ...you probably should have knocked."