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Joke of the Day

"if you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say, ""in jesus name amen"""

"What do you call a smug criminal going down stairs? A Condescending Con Descending."

"I suffer from an unusual obsessive compulsive disorder, CDO I have to write acronyms in alphabetical order"

"My kids are gonna be super disappointed when they find out sweet talk involves no exchange of tangible confectionary goods."

"What would a pig name a chain of food stores? ""Stop ""N Slop Markets"""

"My farmer buddy is so lazy. Even when we go to the bar, he only picks the low hanging fruit."

"Today someone was killed with a starter pistol. Police think it might be race related."

"I like my children how I like my Christmas decorations Only on the holidays."

"What do you call a communist pirate ship? The USS Arrrrrr"

"it's 2013 and food can still make you fat get it together science."