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Joke of the Day

"""The N stands for number so no need to say 'PIN number'. ""Terribly sorry, I'll start again: 'You're dead if you don't give me your PIN'."

"Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything's grey I'm a dog"

"Recently developed melanoma on my cheek, so I quickly went to the dermatologist. Turns out I just fell asleep on a chocolate chip."

"A smile every mile will get you further faster but if that doesn't work, carjacking does."

"So, is Dora 18 yet, or what? Asking for a friend."

"What do you call a dumb seal? An imbeseal"

"Why is the LSU football team like my car? They both used to have Les (less) Miles!"

"When I was younger, I used to feel like I was a man trapped in a woman's body Then I was born. (Source: sickipedia)"

"How many contortionists fit in the trunk of a regular sedan? Depends on the size of the pieces."

"*police sirens* *Dad bursts into my room wearing a Princess Leia costume* ""HIDE THIS NO TIME TO EXPLAIN"" *throws bag of cinnamon buns at me*"