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Joke of the Day

"Reasons people claim to be gay: 3% - are actually gay 97% - forgot to log out of facebook"

"What part of your hand is the most salty? The NaCls"

"I hate it when I go to clean my daughters room & I emerge 3 hours later having just finished a delightful tea party with a giraffe & a pony."

"Did you hear about the guitarist that got arrested? He was fingering A minor."

"For your anniversary, if your wife asks for something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in 3 seconds...don't get her a bathroom scale. Nope."

"A sheep, a drum and a snake fall off a cliff. ""Baa-Dum-Tss"""

"Why did the Egyptians build the pyramids? To get to the other side."

"i just thought of a funny line to use in my old age ""when i am having trouble peeing, i look down, and tell my penis to stop being a dick, and get on with it."""

"I am so happy the US Supreme Court legalized gay marriage because I know that now the government and citizens will focus on the really important problems and issues."

"Police Officer and the Pothead Police Officer: ""How high are you?"" Pothead: ""No officer, it's ""Hi, How are you?"""