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Joke of the Day

"I told my girlfriend I wanted to try the orca in bed tonoght. I wanted to see how long I can last Tilikum."

"If you have a bee in your hand, what do you have in your eye? Beauty."

"What genre consists of erotic novels? Cliterature"

"Why dont applebees employees wear watches? Cuz theres a clock on the microwave"

"What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal? His shoulder. One more...what's black and sits at the top of a staircase? Stephen Hawking after a house fire. I'm so sorry"

"Black walks into a bar A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks ""where'd you get that?"" Parrot says ""Africa, there's millions of them""."

"When is your door annoying? When it'sa Jar-Jar."

"What does Delia Smith say when she wants to fight a road? 'Let's be avenue.'"

"My dad's take on 35 years of marriage. Me: ""Mom and Dad, how does it feel to have been married for 35 years?"" Dad: ""Well, it only seems like it's been 5 minutes..."" Mom: ""Awww!"" Dad: ""...Underwater."""

"What do you call a little Lannister when winter finally comes? Peter Shrinklage"