16760

Joke of the Day

"It's pretty easy to get pussy with a puppy You just replace the S's with P's"

"What do you call a family that runs a gas station? Pump kin."

"What does a homeless man gets for Christmas? A cold."

"So carrying a ""wet floor"" sign and putting it down immediately after using your best pickup line on a woman is frowned upon Dating is hard."

"What do scientists and vegetables have in common? Stephen Hawking"

"There are some benefits to having alzheimers For example, you get to meet new people constantly."

"I played a blank CD at full blast yesterday ...the mimes next door went nuts."

"After all these years, Bono 'still hasn't found what he's looking for'. Perhaps he might have more luck if he took those stupid sunglasses off..."

"COP: Do you realize you were speeding back there? ME: Can you be sure it wasn't just the planet slowing down? COP: I'm listening"

"Sure my mom birthed & raised me, but I've had to explain how to check her email 95,000 times, so let's just call it even."