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Joke of the Day

"Why did the pet proctologist fear his first feline procedure? Because wether he succeeded or failed, he knew he'd end up with a cat-ass-trophy on his hands."

"What's the hardest part of washing a vegetable? putting them back in the wheelchair"

"Whats the difference between an Irish wedding, and an Irish funeral? There's one less drunk."

"I asked a guy what his favorite movie was earlier today. And it was not Paul Blart: Mall Cop"

"What do little piglets do on a Saturday night? Have a pigjama party!"

"Junk is something that you've kept for years & throw away 3 weeks before you need it."

"If my girlfriend and I were stoners, I would propose by asking ... ...""Marriage, you wanna?"""

"When I'm too lazy to understand something, I simply label it as ""pretentious"" and move on. I am an American."

"Being a chemist, I feel pleasure to announce that I've just Synthesised CPH4(lucy drug). I wish I could post it in r/worldnews."

"What do Japanese Cannibals Eat Raw-men"